Truely

Everyone keeps asking me how i am..
i reply that im great
the truth?
well i truely think that i am not fine
i feel as though my whole life has turned upside down in like seconds
i feel as though there is nothing that is ever going to make it go back
i feel like something has been taken from me
forever

i truely have no idea how i feel
all i know is that its not great

.

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change
courage to change the things I can
and wisdom to know the difference

turned around

okay so everything was going great
and then out of no where
im left completly alone
and my whole life just seems to go upside down
now i have no idea what too do
i mean i did nothing wrong to deserve this did i?
do i go on like im fine?
or do i completly break down?

The end of it all

today i was told something
this something has hurt me
its left my heart in milllions of bits and peices
and well i dont know if it will ever be fixed

tied together with a smile

Hold on, baby, you're losing it
The water's high, you're jumping into it
And letting go... and no one knows
You cry, but you don't tell anyone
That you might not be the golden one
And you're tied together with a smile
But you're coming undone

stop the river

man i dont know whats up with me today
thismorning i couldnt really sleep so i got up at seven and went inside
then everything made me feel like crying
then i went to church and stil i felt like crying like at any second it was going to come out
so after i walked home in the rain and cried
i just cried
and now im home(alone for the night) and im still crying ahhh i just cant stop

what a failure

this suck
ahh yesterday i had work at twelve which ment i wouldnt be able to see my exam results till i had finished
six hours later and im almost running home in my long work pants and top in like almost 30 degree temp(okay i not actually sure what it was maybe less)
the first thing i do is go to the computer
man i was soo gutterd
i tried so hard and studied and even sat by myself in some classes to work
ahhh why did i put so much effort into what i know i couldnt do
i had 15 papers
and only passed 4
that means i didnt pass 11
11 papers
i thought i was doing soo well
ahh makes me so angry at myself
then my friend who actually did better then me was upset at herself so i forgot about me and thought about her
but then it made me feel like everything she said about herself she was saying back too me not because thats what she thought of me but because i must be waay more stupid and waay more dumb than she says she is
ahhh i wish that i could get away from having to go to school and tests and exams
im just not good enough for it all